It’s something every tech-savvy person, especially those of us who have been around computers for a few decades, has experienced more times than we’d care to count.
Whether from friends, family, or even neighbours, the conversation often starts innocently enough, with a friendly, “Hello, how are you?”
But you know it’s coming, and soon it will slip out...
“Something's wrong with my computer... It's acting funny.”
You sigh, but with a smile.
You know the drill by now. You’ve been through it countless times before...
The computer is "acting funny," which is code for, "I did something, but I don’t know what, and now everything is broken." And of course, there’s always that inevitable admission:
“I clicked on something... I don’t know what I clicked on, but now everything’s all messed up.”
I often reply to this with a half-joking, "... when you clicked on it, did it say, 'click on this and it will totally mess up your computer..?'"
"I don't know," is the reply...
Here’s the thing – as much as we roll our eyes and brace ourselves for what will probably be a long and winding troubleshooting session, there's a part of us that enjoys these calls... we learn from them... and as every day's a school day, we find ourselves in our favourite class.
Having a reputation for being the go-to techie when friends or family members have a tech problem, means they trust us to be the digital Sherlock Holmes who can solve the mystery of why their computer now resembles something from a bad science fiction movie.
That trust in us is motivation to calm them down and solve the problem as smoothly as possible.
So, let’s take a light-hearted journey through what happens when you get "the phone call".
Step One: The Opening Act – The Interrogation
The first hurdle in any troubleshooting adventure is figuring out exactly what the problem is. People who aren’t as tech-savvy tend to describe computer issues with a sort of poetic vagueness.
“So, what exactly is happening?” you ask.
“Well,” they begin, “the screen went all weird, and then a box popped up, and I clicked on it… but I don’t know what it said. Then it started acting funny.”
You lean back in your chair and take a deep breath. Of course, it’s never a clear description.
It’s never, “I accidentally clicked a suspicious link in an email, and now my computer is infected with malware.” No, that would be too easy. Instead, you’re left to piece together clues like a digital detective.
“The screen went weird?” you ask, trying to pry a bit more detail out of them.
“Yeah, like, things started flashing, and then the mouse got really slow.”
Right. This could be anything from a minor glitch to full-on digital Armageddon. You’re going to need more information, but it’s always like pulling teeth.
“Okay, when did this start happening?”
“Oh, about an hour ago. I was just checking my emails, and there was this thing... like a link thing... and then... well, I clicked it, but I don’t know what it was. Do you?"
At this point, you not only consider the advantages of investing in a crystal ball, you also start preparing for the worst. Dangerous links are often the gateway to more nefarious things, but you’re still not sure what kind of chaos you’re dealing with yet.
Step Two: The Remote Assistance Dilemma
You’ve tried talking them through things on the phone before, but it’s rarely a smooth experience.
When you ask them to “open a browser window,” which they've done a gazillion times, as they're often panicking at this stage, they’ll often reply with a shaky, “How do I do that?"
When you suggest restarting the computer, they’ll ask, “Will that delete my emails?”
This is why, in most cases, the next step is to request remote access.
There are, of course, a variety of tools you can use to connect to someone’s computer remotely, but getting the person on the other end to install and run the software is another ordeal in itself.
“Okay, I’m going to send you a link, and I just need you to click on it and follow the instructions,” you say, feeling cautiously optimistic.
“Click on it?” they respond, with a hint of suspicion. “Last time I clicked on something, this all happened.”
You laugh to yourself. Fair point.
After a few moments you manage to convince them that this particular link is safe, and after a few more minutes of trying to explain what an “remote access” is, you’re finally connected to their computer. You breathe a sigh of relief. Now the real work can begin.
Step Three: Unravelling the Mystery
The moment you get control of their computer, the first thing you do is check for the obvious signs.
Pop-ups all over the place?
Suspicious toolbars in the browser?
A desktop background that has mysteriously changed to a bright red warning with flashing text telling them they’ve been “infected”?
You’ve seen it all.
This time, it’s not so bad.
A rogue toolbar has installed itself in their browser, and their homepage has been hijacked by a search engine you’ve never heard of.
The “thing they clicked on” was probably an advert disguised as a system alert, tricking them into downloading something they definitely didn’t need.
You can’t help but smile.
It’s fixable.
A few uninstalls here, a bit of browser cleaning there, either installing or updating the anti-virus software on their system, and their computer will be back to normal in no time...
... but then, just as you’re about to feel triumphant, they drop the second bombshell:
“Oh, and by the way, I’ve been meaning to tell you… my printer hasn’t worked in weeks.”
Of course it hasn’t.
Step Four: The Tech Support Rabbit Hole
The printer is always the wildcard.
What starts as a straightforward malware removal job can quickly spiral into an afternoon-long saga of updating drivers, reinstalling software, and wrestling with Wi-Fi connections.
Printers, despite existing for decades, still seem to operate on an entirely different plane of existence – one where logic and reason do not apply.
You try to remain calm. “Okay, let me take a look.”
After instructing them how to navigate through several menus, restarting the printer, and, at one point, unplugging and plugging it back in (the oldest trick in the book), they manage to get it working again. Your friend is overjoyed.
They can print their holiday photos again.
Victory is yours!
But, as always, just when you think you're done, they ask:
“Oh, and one more thing. My emails are doing something funny too…”
Step Five: The Never-Ending Task List
You sigh, but you’re not surprised.
You’ve been here before.
What started as a simple “my computer is acting funny” request has now blossomed into a full-blown tech support checklist.
The emails aren’t syncing properly, the desktop icons have rearranged themselves, and there’s some strange program in the system tray that they don’t remember installing.
By now, you’re in too deep to back out.
You’ve come this far, and you’ll see it through to the end. You work through each issue, one by one, all the while keeping up a friendly conversation.
After all, they’re not just calling you because you’re good with computers – they also enjoy chatting with you. And, truth be told, you enjoy it too, even if it’s a bit taxing while half of your mind is scampering around searching for solutions to their tech problem, while the other half of your mind is hoping you're saying "yes" or "no" in the right places while they chat about family, work, the weather...
Step Six: The Parting Words
Eventually, after what feels like an eternity, you manage to fix everything.
The computer is running smoothly again, the printer is printing, and the emails are back to normal.
Your friend is effusive with their gratitude.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” they say. “You’re a lifesaver!”
You smile.
Despite the long afternoon of tech woes, you’re happy to have helped. After all, it’s what you do. And deep down, you know that it won’t be long before you get another call, probably about something equally mysterious.
“Thank you so much,” they say again. “I’ll try not to mess it up this time!”
You chuckle to yourself. “Don’t worry. Just… try not to click on anything suspicious.”
They agree, and your next phone call from them will probably be, "I have this link in my email, is it safe to click on?"
Better safe than sorry!
Step Seven: The Aftermath
After you hang up, you feel a mixture of satisfaction and exhaustion. It’s always a bit of an adventure, helping someone navigate their tech troubles, but it’s also oddly rewarding.
Sure, they might click on something strange again next week, but that’s just part of the charm. And let’s face it – if it weren’t for them, you’d miss out on these little digital detective missions... ... with one added important benefit ...
... that you always learn something new from a technical problem that will hopefully makes the next tech support request you get just that quicker and easier to solve!